2014-10-15 Peeping / Tom

2014-10-15          Peeping / Tom

 

                Behold / the (f) / (b) / (s) / logger, innit It.  He riseth up early in the morning - we were expecting visitors today up in here in the ©indominium, innit you little monsters, you / ©ats, for to check the 'stack', according to the ©indominium Elevator News bulletin, and Cin had to employ the full array of his domestic hahaharsenal; the Vileda broom; the swiffer wet pads; the poor man's electronic / electric Vileda floor sweeper; the cat litter mats, into the washing machine, 'one prophylactic', the exiting guard in John Landis' The Blues Brothers says it better of John Belushi's 'Joliet' Jake Blues's said possession upon Jake’s release from Joliet prison, 'soiled'; for to make the place presentable and avoid the Burlap Sack for you two little monsters - mighty are / his preparations.           

                Course none of them up in up on out on up in up in the ©indominium these days – your humble(d) narrator or your cats neither - is all that hahahappy about having to renew their acquaintances up on out on up on out up here with the cinfines of the cindominium, after months of living la vida loca of three bachelors and tomcats up on out on up on out in Luskvegas on the Quebe© side from July to October and enjoying life in the out / of doors, but if Cin can do it, so too can you little monsters, without soiling every damn mat and surface of the cindominium to make / your point, bringing you ever closer to / The Burlap Sack, 'a bag', Cin's friends - and more / than one - 'and a bridge', of what they would do / did with cats who don’t / didn't behave.

                Caesar's dead-cat necklace story got another mention over the course of last week-end's activities, this version included a detail - up to now unmentioned (and to certain sensitivities and delicate sensibilities almost unmentionable, like a certain percintage of this Take this Thing Back to Baltimore / (s) / (f) / (b) log's material -id.) - namely that your man the dog the Mighty Caesar used to sneak into the barn after hours to continue chasing / the cats, a tactic which was against all / the rules set down for Caesar when it came to his cat-chasing (-killing -id.) proclivities.

 

                This macabre story ended as it always does, with the mighty Caesar  parading around the place with his nappy necklace, not in shame like he was 'assupposed to, but rather instead like he owned / the place, parading around the place with our nappy necklace, not in shame like we're 'assupposed to, but rather instead like we own / the place is all / we gots.  'Have you met' you aksed it better of the guileless co-eds at that party at ©lub Midd as you cuddled in your arms that road-kill cat that you had found only minutes earlier, innit TMJ, with only its head visible above / the fold, 'my cat?', this routine broken only by the piercing scream that resulted after one of them rubbed the head expecting to find Garfield purring, only to find rigor / mortis. 

 

                Good times, that was the house where you guys lived with the Black Jesus shrine in the basement, innit Cash, the successor to the quad where an Irish wake was held for fightin' JM, who lay still in his 2 by 4 coffin for the first several hours of his ostensible ®IP and wake, imbibing occasionally from a mickey slipped into his coffin, before jumping out his pinewood box at midnight to the sounds of the Bee Gees' 'Stayin' Alive', you can't really make / this kind of thing up, or at least to certain sensibilities and delicate sensitivities, you shouldn't. 

 

                This last week-end's activities were more sombre, because more real.  It was the burial of their Uncle, held first in the church graveyard, and then afterwards at the house of another uncle and good friend of the deceased, 'looks like' the surviving uncle said it better of the late uncle's reaction to the comings and goings at the house in town where they were both dating the pair / of daughters that they would marry soon enough - some seventy years ago ! - 'the circus has come to town.'  It was a good story, well-told, it joined the aforementioned Mighty Caesar nappy necklace story, among others, even Cin piped in with how their Uncle showed leadership not by talking about things but by doing them, and doing them exceedingly well, showing leadership not by talking about things but by doing them, and doing them exceedingly well is all / we gots.  'Find something you enjoy,' a pair of musicians - trumpeter and singer Chet Baker and drummer Ginger Baker (not / related except in philosophy -id.) - said it better with little variation during the course of two movies that Cin videed over the course of House Arrest / the Horror (the summer -id.), 'and then do it better than anyone / else.  It's not / complicated,'  finding something you enjoy and then doing it better than anyone else is all / we  gots, and no, unlike some other distractions to be found up on out on up on this Dog and Pony Show, this at least is not / complicated.

 

                Course Cin's videeing hahahabits as of late are somewhat less / edifying, since as of late he exceeded as they say his monthly bandwidth quota with his wireless ISP / Internet Service Provider of 11 Gigabytes, not half-way through the aforementioned month - 'you have exceeded your monthly plan' he was warned better yesterday by his browser, 'by $50.00, do you want / to cintinue ? ' (‘continue’ as it pertains / to ©in  -id.) - and is reduced now to videeing 1940 black-and-white films from his new video rental store, these current ones DVDs, but future rentals will have to be videos, given the store's collection, as in VHS tapes, old school, we'll have to ressucitate the VCR from / the basement, innit you little monsters.

 

                Good thing and bad thing about the new rental outfit is that their records are all paleontological, aka pen / and paper.  Rentals are written down on those receipt pads that Cin used to use when collecting and delivering your knives, necessary for record-keeping due to all the effects on our brains of all the booze and the drugs and the cincussions, and we weren't that bright / to begin with, innit DD, 'twelve fifty', Cin would announce it better at one of the restaurants, bars, or butcher shops, after dropping off and / or collecting the used knives, calculating / the tally with the business end of the pencil in his word-hole, 'all told'.

 

                As if their ears were burning, the current Toshiba flat-screen television and / or the Samsung's nice tits DVD player went blank just now up on out on up on up in here, requiring a power cycle, aka the old on / off by remote, even as Cin hulk-smashed away just now about the new / old VHS / VCR format / technology that's about to be re-introduced up on out on up on out on up here in this cindominium / man-cave / one-room apartment, 'a bachelor' Cin says it better when trying to describe his 10' by 10' cell - this 'room' Virginia Woolf called the writer's essential requirement, 'of one's own' - 'apartment.' 

 

                It was eerie, this sudden and cintolerable silence and blank screen as of late, but fear not, Cin will gladly flog these two Jap products ('but they make' George C. Scott's General Striker says it better in Kubrick's 'Dr. Strangelove, or How I Stopped Worrying and Came To Love / the Bomb', speaking of our various frenemies' unquenchable savagery and blood-thirstiness in war but superiority in matters / technological, 'such good / stereos') for love and / or money, flog in a good way you understand, up on out on up on out in this Take This Thing Back to Baltimore (b) / (f) / (c) / (s) log - seeing as between the two of the devices and all of the movies that they've videed thus far for Cin and his room-mates, all the way through Part I and most of Part II of House Arrest / the Horror - please send your compliments of / the web-master at goggle inc., or to red stripe media, innit It.

               

                Course just as some folks as Slingblade would say - 'some folks call it Hell', Slingblade says it better, in the Billy Bob Thornton movie of the same name, of The Other Place, 'I call it / Hades' - as of late have adopted the paleontological diet (meat / and nuts -id.), so too, can videeing VHS tapes and movies from the 1940s, cinstead of the 2014 movie that Cin had to GTFO of last night (and last week -id.), come with its own / rewards, and this one / is a doozy.

 

                Decades before the horror of found-footage horror films found us, Michael Powell directed 'Peeping Tom', this movie that sunk his career apparently in England for its terrifying-enough subject matter, unrelentingly depicted, but which is eerily prescient to its far cinferior - and far more brutal in both subject and horrors depicted - later successors, 'Hostel' and 'Saw' and 'The Blair Witch Project' and now the countless jumpy others.  Title is unfortunate, certainly, though perfectly descriptive of its contents, like 'Slingblade', 'Scarface', 'The Bad Lieutenant', 'Nundercover', 'Jarvis Grimes is Dead, Either Way', and of course this Take This Thing Back to Baltimore (b) / (f) / (c) / (s) log /

                What it is of course is that psycho / peeping Tom goes about his daily business and life, filming every damn thing, including of course the murdering of various starlets who can't wait to be part of a motion picture - he's a film / gaffer or somefink, innit Cash - but instead end up in one of Tommy's snuff films, which he proceeds to show to the next victim in his erstwhile screening room or wtf.  'At least' one of his victims says it better of the price / of fame, before being written out the script - "I corrected them', Philip Stone's Delbert Grady says it better in Kubrick's take on your The Shining, innit Mr. King, rolling / his 'r's, after being aksed it better by Jack Nicholson's Jack Torrence how Grady fixed / axed his mis-behaving twins, 'and when my wife tried to interfere,' he goes on, 'I corr-ected / her' - by Tommy, 'I was filmed by a studio camera'.

 

                There was no spoiler alert  up on out on up on up in that last paragraph, surely, this premise is the one of the more recent 'Scream' franchise - innit ? - and every other movie made these days, everone filming each other and yes blogging each other and themselves to an early / grave.  It's too precious by half - 'you've spoiled my whole evening', the next one of Tommy's nude 'documentaries' subject says it better, Cockney-style, taking off her clothes (though never on-screen, this being England in the 1940s or wtf, 'TV shows from a country' the BBC America channel ad has it better of the recent flood of British TV shows, 'that hasn't been able to express emotion for / 500 years') for the camera 'you have' - but the body count is in fact low, and little filthy Tommy's raison d'etre, pardon my french, innit Sir Percival, is as much the director's focus as are his 'dirty deeds', Angus Young and AC / DC sing it better in their song of the same name, 'done / dirt cheap.'

                Thanks for reading this Take This Thing Back to Baltimore (b) / (f) / (c) / (s) log .