May 1, 2023 Mayday

             May 1, 2023         Mayday  

 

‘I don’t like’, (y)our man Cin the humble(d) narrator of (t)his Take This Thing Back to Baltime-moires and Mayday hulk-smashed it better with his fancy tiny Japanese pen(is) (hooker please, -id.) in (t)his Little Black Moleskin Inc. Book, whose daylight hours’ home is in Cin’s back-right pants or shorts pocket as we do, and by way of dating / the same because Monday with the Boomtown Rats’ song of the same name - whose chorus cinfamously references a rare-enough compared to its’ (North) American cousins Brexit school shooting ends with ‘I want to shoot the whole day / down’ - from back in the 20th,  ‘Mondays’, but with the unanticipated arrival of (t)his high school Alma mater cinfamous short school bus at the playing grounds of O-Town’s Immaculata High School across Main Street from the Happy Goat Inc. Coffee shop where he is after hulk-smashing away at the same even now, hopefully for an imminent match of Rugby Club high-school level, not to mention the recent end of the ten-day strike at work that four-lettered word at Club Fed,  (t)his Just another Manic Monday after is after looking / up.

(Y)our heart breaks as we do, it’s a roundball match that the high school teams are after warming up for across Main Street, and not Rugby Club at all, which means that (y)our man Cin will not be after getting up on out on up on out on up on out of (t)his prime Happy Goat Real-Estate Main Street-facing window seat - the first time that (y)our man Cin has found himself at this Happy Goat edition since back in February of this year, trying and failing as we do to complete his tax return forms on-time, his only possible and not untrue mansplanation being that his salary at Club Fed over the course of the same is not large enough to result in anything other than the government owing Cin a grand / or two in yearly returns, ‘but’, (y)our man Father LJ, a local O-Town priest tried and failed to (holy)mansplain his frequent visits to the Gatineau Casino over on the Quebec side with the parishioners’ collection plate money better, before during and after his gambling habits came to the attention of the local press at the O-Town Citizen, ‘I was / winning’ - but will cinstead be after watching the soccer action from right here across Main Street because lazy that four-lettered word and (y)our man Cin never sure of his How Does It Feelings when it comes to his Alma Mater high school Ashbury Ashbury RaRaRa since he graduated from the same in 1989 (‘only the Irish” (y)our man Cin gratuitously bad-mouthed the same to the Ashbury Ashbury Ra Ra Ra high school Rugby Club coach who had sent an e-mail ostensibly looking for coaching help to the alumni e-mail list but that did not apparently include (y)our man Cin when he offered up / the same, and referring of course to the members and players of the local O-Town Irish RFC / Rugby Football Club, the most prominent in O-Town because like the New York Yankees the most successful and therefore hated / by all, ‘can show up at three in the afternoon to coach of a week-day’), winning is all / we gots.

Course we ‘ve all of us seen better strikes than the Club Fed one that just ended / today after two weeks of red-hot strike action (hooker please, - id.) - anxiety-inducing  enough for (y)our man Cin as well as surely other fellow Club Fed (that’s enough, -id.) wage-slaves and cubicombers because as above and previously and ad nasueum in the pixels and pages of (t)his Take This THing Back to Baltime-moires and Mayday and as he tries and fails to mansplain the same to his fellow Club Fed wage slaves at the CRA agent in charge of his file, (y)our man Cin and his fellow Club Fed mid-level employees never make enough of a salary to owe much if any in the way of taxes at the end of any given Fiscal Year, or for that matter to save for a rainy day strike fund because cinflation and all / that, ‘why doncha all head down to Dalhousie Street’, (y)our man their co-worker at the FOTM cinfamously suggested it better to us back in the 20th, innit Itt, sick and tired as he was of listening to the Nosluoc droogs go on and on and on about how skint they were and all / that morning noon and night as we do, and referring of course to what passed for  O-Town’s cinfamous Red Light district at the time in Onterrible, ‘and suck / cock’  - in countless on-screen bowling scenes, ‘Imma shove that gun up / your ass’ (y)our man the actor John Turturro, playing Jesus of all people in the Coen brothers’ immor(t)al film The Big Lebowski, innit Electrified JC, threatening one of his Bowling League competitors in that movie as we do with his own / pistol, ‘ , and pull the trigger until it goes / click’’, anxiety-cinducing  is all / we gots.

Damn near flat / broke as we do that five-lettered wordle before during and after the(ir) recently-concluded strike unpleasantness - 150,000 strong in the(ir) Club Fed union, and god love ‘em for it, unions the world / over well and truly the last defence of cubicombers and wage-slaves the world / over because the World Is Yours owned now by five or six mega-corporations, 'capitalism’, (y)our man the actor Al Pacino playing Tony Montana as Scarface in the immor(t)al Brian De Palma movie of the same name says it better, in a line that gets far less / attention than it deserves, ‘is getting / fucked’ - (y)our man Cin tried / and failed to cinvince himself last Thirstday (and they never get any more / or less / thirsty) to go up to Parliament Hill in O-Town to ‘knock’, (y)our man Cin tried and failed to lure some fellow unionist(a)s to join him in the same, ‘some heads’ for the seventy five dollars in strike pay that four hours in the picket line and twenty years’ of union dues apparently gets us, fucked is all / we gots. 

Course the dea(r)th of a web-site to register for strike duty and / or strike pay and all / that soon put an end to (y)our man Cin’s grandiose plan to head up to O-Town’s Parliament Hill for to knock / some heads last Thirstday - and they never get any more / or less / thirsty - but up / he went anyway as we do to ‘smell’, the(ir) (wo)manager at work that four-letttered word described it better, ‘the air’.  Taking a bench across from the scene of his fellow-unionists picketing on that  street corner across from Parliament Hill on O-Town’s Wellington Street - the large numbers of unionist(a)s on the Hill videed on the television the night / before and what enraged (y)our man Cin enough to make the hour commute from the(ir) pandemic Nosluoc home in Luksvegas on the Quebec side of the Quebec-Ontariariariariariario border to Parliament Hill having dispersed as we do - and wasn’t he cinstead after spending a pleasant-enough Thirsday after before during and after morally supporting his fellow-unionist(a)s for a while from his seat on a bench in the same park, where eight (?) years ago (y)our man(iac) shot / and killed an unarmed sentry at the tomb of the Unknown Soldier across from Parliament Hill before during and after car-jacking a vehicle for the twenty metre car ride remaining onto Parlimant Hill itself and then shooting up / the place before during and after being terminated with extreme prejudice by the Parliament Hill head / of security, all of this shooting and carjacking taking place in the park where (y)our man Cin had driven right / past only minutes before.  

All of this before during and after last Thirstday after until that is that it got too / cold, and off Cin went of that Thirstday after, first for an hours’ worth of head shrinkage over the phone with (y)our man his shrink because tele-psychology post-COVID that five-lettered word, that infamous Thirstday after book-ended as we do by videeing somehow the entirety of this unwatchable movie To Catch a Killer , the rare-enough film whose trailer is action-packed and red-hot because Shaline Woodley (hooker please, -id.) but whose actual videeing is inexorable, shrinkage is all / we gots.     

Thank you for reading (t)his Take This Thing Back to Baltime-moires and Mayday.