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5/18/2024 (s)mother’s day (hooker please)

 

5/18/2024   (s)mother’s day  

 

(hooker please, -id.), or, ©in-f®ee / at 53, ‘sin-f®ee’, (y)our man Flash said it better twenty (!) years ago – before during and afte® conve®ting to ©atholi©ism at age 33 be©ause marrying / a ©atholi© and required to make it / offi©ial in order to get the deed / done in a ©atholi© ©hu®ch be©ause ©hu®ch / ®ules – ‘at thirty-three’, and (y)our man Flash under / the imp®ession that J© died / on the c®oss in order to forgive us / our sins innit Ele©t®ified J©, making it / offi©ial is all / we gots.

 

Course it won’t / be easy that four-lettered wo®d, (y)our man ©in the nom / de plume and nom / de gue®®e and humble(d) narrator of (t)his Take This Thing Back to Baltime-moi®es and (s)mother’s day ever since it’s in©eption back in 2013 be©asue House A®®est and the early days of ®egime ze®o, hulk-smashing away at the pixels and pages of the same as an omni©ient and un®eliable narrato® both  - perhaps somewhat less omni©ient  and un®eliable elevenseseseses yea®s later be©ause Yea® Elevenseseseses of ®egime ze®o  - ©in©eption is all / we gots.

 

‘They picked’, (y)our man ©in said it better – and apropos the(ir) local ‘long-hai®’ as the(ir) uncle Ken used to call the musicians playing and organizing some of them ©lassi©al musi© ©on©e®ts held up on out on up on out on up on out on up on out on up in the hayloft formerly known as the ‘upper barn’ at the ho®se fa®m in Luksvegas once owned by the(ir)  Noslou© relatives the Laf®amboiseseseseses, and now owned and operated by the on©e-and through no fault of / thei® own ©itiot family from O-Town who moved up on out on up on out on up on out on up in (t)here in the yea® 2000 aka Y2K and who have (wo)managed to stay, unlike certain transplanted ©itiots, ever / since, God love ‘em, innit God  – ‘the wrong / week-end’, before during and after hearing of the long-haired musicians and collective Pontia© En©hanté’s  decision to hold a rare-enough ©inday after (hooky please, -id.) concert tomorrow afte®, this one in addition  to the one scheduled for later this Satu®day afte® befo®e du®ing and afte® it be©omes Another Sadu®day Night and I Ain’t Got Nobody, innit ©at Stevens, and how the ©inday after ©once®t will be held at the swank Wakefield Mill restaurant up on out on up on out on up on out on up on out on up on up on over / the Gatineau hills from Luksvegas, The Mill otherwise mostly ©infamous for its’ three-figu®e b®un©hes on (s)Mothe®’s Day (that’s enough, -id.) which was of course last week-end, ©infamous is all / we gots.

 

 Course sometimes you pi©k / (y)our poison, innit Poison – ‘sometimes you beat / the b(e)a®’, (y)our man the actor Sam Eliot, playing a sort / of narrator in the immo®(t)inal Coen brothers’ film The Big Lebowski, ‘and sometimes the b(e)a®’ (to this / day, (y)our man ©in, who from his hal©yon p®e-®egime ze®o days and nights / and de©ades know of what / the narrator speaks, is un©e®tain whether it’s ‘ba®’, or

‘bea®’, but either way, both / wo®k) ‘beats / you’ – and sometimes (y)our poison picks / you, and wasn’t (y)our man ©in the on©e-and-futu®e humble(d) narrator of (t)his Take This Thing Back to Balti-memoi®es and (s)mothe®’s day after being sort-or ®oped into various activities last week-end, not entirely of his own / making or p®efe®en©e be©ause ©ont®ived, but as a wiser (wo)man / than ©in once wrote in the pixels and pages of a memoi® and book other than / this one, no one ever earned b®ownie points for blowing off mother’s day  activities, b®ownie points is all / we gots.

 

          What it is – and not for the fi®st / or last / time – is that (y)our man ©in the on©e-and-futu®e humble(d) narrator of (t)his Take This Thing Back to Balti-memoi®es and (s)mothe®’s day was after getting blind-sided last Satu®day afte® befo®e du®ing and afte® it became Another Sadu®day night and I Ain’t Got Nobody by a Fa®©ebook posting up on out on up on out on up on out on up on out on up on out on the ©inte®nets – despite no / end of efforts on (t)his end to avoid / the same be©ause Fifty Shades of G(®)ay (hooker please, -id.)  - for a 50th bi®thday party taking place in the West End of O-Town in (S)tit(t)sville, the post that four-lettered word drawing / the attention of (y)our (wo)man the(ir) pandemi© house-mate and Ma Noslou©, who is ‘f®iends’ in the ve®na©ula® of / the app with the autho®(ess) of the post and bi®thday gi®l both, though a 50th birthday pa®ty more a matter of ‘putting the ‘fun’’, (y)our man ©in described the ©hallenge(s) of putting on such / an event better last TGIFF®iday night, innit G, ‘ in ‘fune®al’’, fifty being, (y)our man ©in has of late said it better and apropos / the same over no end / of different media that five-lettered wo®dle, and more / than on©e, ‘the new / seventy’, putting the fun / in fune®al is all / we gots.

 

          Course a Fa®©ebook post that four-lettered wo®d ought never suffi©e on its’ own to lu®e / a taxpaye® from the ®elative / ©alm of a Satu®day after before during and after it be©omes Another Sadu®day Night and I Ain’t Got Nobody (that’s enough self-fulfilling / p®ophe©ising, -id.)  spent in Luksvegas on the Quebec – ‘Koo’, (y)our (wo)man H®isSue (hooker please, -id.) pronounced it better last / night, ‘be©’ – side , and wasn’t (y)our man ©in earlier that week after swearing up / and down that he would be after attending the 50th bi®thday pa®ty in (S)tit(t)sville on the Onta®ia®ia®ia®ia®ia®io side, before during and after chatting on the phone with a mutual a©quaintan©e (and if you haven’t yet / ©ottoned on to it dea® ®eade®(s), the th®ee / of them once thi©k / as thieves back in the hal©yon p®e-®egime ze®o days and nights and de©ades, before during and after every damn thing be©ame / a p®odu©tion), who told him also over the phone about the event that five-lettered wo®dle, and so off (y)our man ©in went to t(his) 50th birthday pa®ty be©ause double-tapped over the phone and the ©inte®nets both,  ‘off’ (y)our men Eddy Vedde® and the rest of the ®ocke®s in the g®oup Pea®l Jam sing it better in the(ir) song of the same name, this one about Ku®t ©obain, ®IP, once f®ontman of ®o©k Gods Ni®vana, innit God, ©obain who would do just / that according to Vedde® when things got / ®angy as we do, ‘he / goes’, and ‘®unning away’, (y)our man ©in described the same ©hoi©es better in ®ugby ©lub terms, and for how (y)our man and ©in’s fellow Hound Mc©®a©ken would be after doing / the same before during and after he, too, RIPed as we do, ‘from suppo®t’, enough self-fulfilling / p®ophe©ising is all / we gots.

 

          ‘Nothing either good / or bad’ (y)our m(elan©holy D)an(e) Hamlet from the Shakespea®e play of the same name from back in the 18th  (hooker please, try 1601, -id.) pontifi©ates it better as we do, ‘but thinking makes it so’, and while last yea®’s Yea® Ten of ®egime Ze®o involved no end of (y)our man ©in adopting a ‘ Take It or Leave It’ approach to the various – (two, -id.) – booze that five-lettered wo®dle or booze-adja©ent events to which he found himself ©invited in the Year of our Lo®d 2023, innit Lo®d, mostly of course leaving / it, Yea® Elevenseseseseses of the same may require thinking to make it / good that four-lettered wo®d, and so (y)our man ©in’s hour-and-a-half ©ommute-by-fe®®y from the Koobe© to the Onta®i®i®i®ia®ia®io side one week ago to the day, followed by the hour and a half and at the most that he spent at the party itself and then the hour-and-a-half return  trip by bridge to the Koobe© side, and tail-gated pretty much constantly as we do these days be©ause ©a®s and the(ir) d®ive®s both d®iven pa®don-the-pun nowadays psy©hoti© almost-by-definition, and the whole last Sadu®day night and I Ain’t Got Nobody (y)our man ©in describes as ‘good’ to who(m)ever / will listen (no one / listens), ©in-f®ee at fifty-th®ee is all / we gots.

 

          Thank you for trading (t)his Take This Thing Back to Balti-memoires and Mother’s Day .         

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